It's 2015, and we can sleep with whomever, wherever and as many times as we like. Many of us are in committed relationships, and some of us are even married (But for the record, no slut-shaming.) However, not all gay men are sex addicts. Gay men have a reputation for being promiscuous and sex-obsessed, which probably stems from the widespread and public popularity of hook-up apps like Grindr.
Gay men are all wild sex maniacs who are incapable of monogamy. Did you know we still can’t donate blood? 9. All gay men have AIDS.īut honestly, people still think this. While I am sure some gay male relationships operate on this dichotomy, it's just damn wrong to generalize it in all gay relationships.Īlthough a person may prefer one form of intimacy to another (and both are fun), most committed, long-term gay relationships are what we term "versatile." One of us is always the top, and one of us is always the bottom. (How’s that for stereotypes?)ĭon’t flatter yourself. I'm sorry, but straight men are dirty, sweaty and have no taste. No doubt I found some of the guys in the gym in high school hot, but that doesn’t mean I hit on every straight guy I meet. I do not dream about hooking up with you, "straight" boy in the locker room. Gay men can’t help themselves from hitting on straight guys.įor the love of all that is holy, hell no. Some gay men prefer Monday Night Football to box seats at "Cats." 5. I hate to break it to you, but not all gay guys even like theatre.Īll people (yes, including gay men) have varied interests. While we all no doubt love “Good Morning Baltimore,” not all gay men love Broadway. Gay men can’t love sports? Sorry (not sorry), but that, my friends, is homophobic. That's why I am always shocked when people are so deliriously surprised I know so much about every sport. Some of my fondest memories growing up are from going to see the Cubs play at Wrigley Field. I love my female friends, but I am a man who happens to love men. To say all gay men are feminine is to take away our male identity and personhood, and it make us just another one of "the gals." My first boyfriend hated it so much that he let his mom buy all of his clothes. (Get me to an H&M or Zara quick!)īut, not all of us gay men love shopping. Gay men are all feminine, shopping-loving queens.ĭon’t even get me started on the term “queen.” It's unbelievably insensitive in and of itself, but alas, I digress. If you can’t wrap your head around the idea two men can love each other without taking on traditional gender role, or if you’re having trouble coping with our sexual identity, please go see a doctor and leave us alone. Gender and sexuality are two different things. The male-female dichotomy is madly heteronormative.Īlthough in some situations one of us is more feminine than the other, this isn't always true for every relationship. We are not Betty and Steve we are Adam and Steve. My boyfriend is not the "man," and I am most definitely am not the "woman." I want to date a man, and that is the exact point. This is extremely untrue, not to mention totally mind-boggling. So, friends, let’s get to debunking gay stereotypes: 1. I'm tired of being labeled something I'm not. The media claims we are all sissies, sex-crazed maniacs and haters of sports. Whether you like men, women, both or neither, you deserve to be yourself. No one should never feel pressured to subscribe to the watered-down societal tropes history has attempted to serve us.Īfter all, every human being is different.
When is society going to accept we are human beings, not objects? Stereotypes are used in a way to dehumanize and make being gay something people can only be “comfortable with” or “cope with." The oppression and repression of gay men throughout history - from ancient times and early Christianity to the modern AIDS crisis - has been rooted in fear and falsities. Stereotypes may be grounded in the truth or be complete and utter falsehoods, but they are dangerous regardless of where they come from. When society makes fun of and degrades gay men for things that are patently untrue, young gay men are left without proper role models, failed by a society that describes them with generalizations. Stereotypes about gay men are destructive to both how society views us, as well as to how we view ourselves. Nonetheless, an unhealthy, pervasive and heteronormative stereotype still exists. In a gay relationship, there is not a man and a woman there are two men.
“Who is the girl, and who is the guy in your relationship?” an acquaintance asked me just the other day.